Past Issue, June 1 - Heroes
Posted on June 20, 2007
Filed Under Past Issues, Fulfillment |
We are humbled to offer this issue of My Goodness Magazine as a tribute of sorts to all the heroes in the world. We take this opportunity to say thank you for the tireless tutoring you give, the thankless diapers you change and the silent prayers you utter. Heroes, we honor you.
As you read my article on the Fill Your Spirit page, Flying With No Cape, remember along with me those teachers who made a difference in your life. And, on her Free Your Mind page, Monique dares to coax out the inner hero in us all with her article, Revealing Your Secret Identity . . . I hope you’re not afraid to fly because the sky is the limit! Also, enjoy some thoughtful quotes from some of our greatest thinkers on heroism and what it is to be a hero on the Feed Your Soul page. And, lastly, we are so grateful to introduce a real-life hero among us in Sharon Vigil, operator of Harvest House for Women. You, too, will want to stand and give a round of applause for the heroic work she does in response to her love for God and his daughters.
Yes! Strike up the band and let the ticker tape fall because this is your salute, you everyday, ordinary hero you!
Peace and Blessings,
Nicole Walters for
My Goodness Magazine
Flying With No Cape by Nicole Walters
Nicole is presently sneezing from allergies, amazed that she doesn’t worry more when her 16-year-old son is out driving, jealous that her husband works from home and is grateful that God is in control of all that.
I need a hero
I’m holding out for a hero ‘til the end of the night
He’s gotta be strong
And he’s gotta be fast
And he’s gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I’m holding out for a hero ‘til the morning light
He’s gotta be sure
And its gotta be soon
And he’s gotta be larger than life
- Bonnie Tyler
And then a hero comes along,
With the strength to carry on,
And you cast your fears aside and you know you can survive,
So when you feel like hope is gone,
Look inside you and be strong,
And you’ll finally see the truth that a hero lies in you.
- Mariah Carey
I can be you hero baby
I can kiss away the pain
I will stand by you forever
You can take my breath away
- Enrique Iglesias
I had a hero when I was a little girl . . . only, I didn’t know it at the time. It wasn’t until, in preparing for this article, when I looked back upon people who have impacted me positively over the course of my life that I recognized him as one. His name was Mr. Valerie. He was my 5th grade teacher. Mr. Valerie, or Mr. “V” as we like to call him, taught English and recognized in me a potential for advancement. He talked to a few folks and made a few calls that led to my taking a test that landed me in a gifted and talented program for Jr. High – but I think it’s called Middle School now . . .
The Middle School that I attended was not in my neighborhood, and required a great personal sacrifice from my family so that I could attend. Early morning bus rides, working through the peer pressure of, for the first time in my life, feeling like a minority, and an accelerated education that I was suddenly less sure I could actually manage were just a few of the challenges I faced at this Middle School that Mr. V ushered into my life. However, it was at this particular school that I met my best friend, Monique Ruffin, who co-writes this little magazine with me and remains my best friend to this very day. It was also the same school that my husband attended then, and that was a good thing because back in the day he was a little squirrelly and needed an eye on him for his own good. I also met Mr. Carroll while at this Middle School. He was yet another English teacher who, despite my only sometimes participation in his class, really grew, encouraged and nurtured my budding love for writing and literature. I fell in love with plays in his class and he saw that. He took extra time with me to discuss Greek tragedies, Shakespearian theatre, and other plays while dealing with the normal chaos of a room full of energetic and wisecracking 13-year-olds. I couldn’t get enough.
After talking incessantly about my newfound love with my mother, she took Marc and I (yes, Marc and I . . . even then . . . can you believe it?) to see Yul Brenner in The King and I at the Pantages in LA. Me, a little wiry-haired girl from a mostly black, middle-class Los Angeles suburb, at the Pantages Theater watching history because of Mr. Carroll and his interest in me. Hmmmmm.
It was in High School that Mr. Mangone sealed the deal as far as my love for writing goes. As my English teacher, he suggested that I join his journalism class. Done! I wrote articles, interviewed students and teachers and looked with pride upon the black and white results every time we published and I saw “Nicole Conard” in the byline. I felt such a sense of accomplishment and purpose then, a little like I do today with this magazine. Who knew?
My life was and is full of heroes. Everyday, “ordinary” people who just decide to do good in whatever they are doing. My mom and dad, my brother and sister, my husband and sons, my friends and even some casual acquaintances have all been heroes to me. And, with regards to Mr. V, Mr. Carroll and Mr. Mangone, not a one of them resemble anything near knights in shining armor. Mr. V. wore way too much oil in his thinning and wispy hair, Mr. Carroll suffered a rather large nose and pocked skin, and Mr. Mangone, in his too tight jeans, weighed less than me then and most certainly than me now. But these guys, these teachers who decided not to be wearied by the demands of teaching, made a mark on my life that I still gratefully bear today.
I don’t know if as Mr. V, Mr. Carroll or Mr. Mangone invested in my life they knew the impact they’d eventually have. I can’t imagine they did. As a student back then I was largely dismissive, easily distracted (mostly by boys, mostly named Marc), and frustratingly casual. But they persisted. Not so much, I believe, because of me, but more in response to their own convictions, their own integrity and their own quest of fulfillment. I, with my only temperamental interest, could not have possibly been the motivation for their goodness toward me, it had to be something deeper, more personal and greater the compelled them. That’s who heroes are and what they do . . . the something greater that compels them.
When asked why she took the responsibility of hiding Anne Frank and her family from the Nazis, risking her own life in the process, Meip Gies replied, “Permanent remorse about failing to do your human duty, in my opinion, can be worse than losing your life.”
After saving the life of a fellow traveler while putting his own in jeopardy, New York Subway Superman, Wesley Autrey, said, “I don’t feel like I did something spectacular; I just saw someone who needed help. I did what I felt was right.”
Nobel Peace Prize winner and one-time operator of 517 missions in more than 100 countries, Mother Teresa, said of her impact on the world, “One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody.”
I’m so grateful that heroism isn’t limited to red capes, secret identities, noble steeds, or possessing some freakish preternatural trait. The truth is that not many of us are faster than a speeding bullet, stronger than a locomotive, or can leap tall buildings in a single bound. But, each of us can be a hero.
Psalm 16: 3 The godly people in the land are my true heroes! I take pleasure in them!
Champion a cause. What do you feel passionately about that either breaks your heart or causes it to soar? Mentor a child. Do you have a weekend a month to spare? Start a ministry. Is there a need in your community directly before you that no one else is doing a thing about? To quote Rodney Copperbottom from the animated movie Robots: see a need; fill a need.
It’s funny. The world, with its poverty, child neglect, overcrowded jails, global warming and human trafficking, is in desperate need of heroes, and yet it is full of them at the same time . . . I just think more of us need to come out of the phone booth and take flight, one life at a time. Now, up, up, and away already! There are people who need rescue.
Peace and Blessings,
Nicole Walters
The Honest to Goodness Truth:
Galatians 6:9,10 - Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.
Speak Their Names!
We invite you to, in honor of those people who have made a difference in your life, to list their names in the comments section below. Acknowledge their contribution. Give praise where praise is due. Grow the good.
Revealing Your Secret Identity by Monique Ruffin-James
Monique is having the time of her life being home with her 4-month-old son, writing for My Goodness Magazine, going for long walks, having great conversations with strangers, shopping at the Saturday Farmer’s Market and getting closer to God moment by moment.
My heart is overflowing with awe and joy as I write this article. I’m filled with gratitude for the goodness, the sacrifice, and the unconditional love shone me on numerous occasions in my life. I have been blessed to experience the courage and the power of a “hero” – those people whose actions and foresight changed the trajectory of my life.
In the earliest years of our lives, we are given images and definitions of heroes, well super heroes that is . . . People with super powers who are not subject to the laws of nature. Superman, Wonder Woman, Spider Man, the $6 Million Man and the Bionic Woman are just a few of the super heroes who inspired us to dream when we were younger. They were unstoppable: x-ray vision, super human strength, spinning webs, and single handedly capturing the bad guy. We loved them and wanted to be them, often pretending we could fly and save the day just the way they did. But those were fantastic stories, fairytales created to entertain and encourage the imagination of children. Why are children so fascinated with super heroes? Is it because that as children life hasn’t yet asked that they face the sometimes harsh realities of the human experience? Or is it because, if they have been exposed to human pain, children still have the ability to remain forever hopeful and unjaded for a better tomorrow? It is the nature of a child to trust, to fantasize and to hope eternal. Super heroes offer all of those possibilities.
As we become adults, our lives begin to take a new direction. Responsibility becomes a reality and we stop pretending we can fly or capture the bad guy with our bare hands. We forget about the summer afternoons when we ran, jumped and leapt into the air with the intention to save someone from harm’s way. Or should I say some of us forget. There are those of us who grow up and become heroes, people who live this life accepting the call to assist and love others into greatness, wellness and freedom. They inspire us to be better, to look deep within our own hearts and ask, “What can I do?” Encountering a hero invites us to question who we are, what we’re capable of and how we are using our lives.
In truth, the actions of one can inspire greatness in the masses. These heroes are not hard to find, they are our teachers, our ministers, our parents, grandparents and friends. They are the ones who see us better than we can see ourselves, believe in us more than we believe in ourselves and they come in and save the day. Not like Wonder Woman, but sort of… See they don’t fly but they enable us to. They don’t have eyes that can see through concrete and steal, but they can see our futures based on our behaviors. And yes, their strength is sometimes all we have until we realize what they have known all along, that we have strength of our own and that we are capable, brilliant, worthy.
Look in your life. Who are your heroes? Consider who inspires you to heroic deeds. You’ll find them running non-profit organizations, in hospitals, nursing homes, schools, churches, and day care centers. They are often doing the jobs many would never do, far away from the lights and red carpets where our celebrities strut their stuff and strike poses for the cameras. No, you probably won’t find real-life heroes being applauded, praised, or admired. They work in the shadows where the underprivileged, disenfranchised, addicted, impoverished and abused lived. They dedicate their lives to the service, the safety and the healing of others. And, they do this with no expectation of reward or acknowledgement.
What we see in heroes we possess as well. If we look deep into our hearts, we discover a desire to serve ourselves and others to be the best selves we can. If we follow our desire to be of service and to be connected to others and to love deeply, we discover a hero within. But first we must look past our need for wealth and material gain for the sake of having more. The wellbeing of our families and communities must become a priority. When we begin to see the wellbeing of another as valuable as our own, our giving becomes boundless. People who dedicate their lives to serving others often declare they get more from giving than they expected. I can attest to this.
Many years ago I spent Sundays reading to a group of elderly women in an assisted living facility. It was my desire to spend time talking, reading and having stimulating conversation about books. Instead they loved on me, offering me their wisdom, their stories and their desires for my happiness. Each time we ended our afternoons together, I felt like I should pay them for what they had given me. Instead I scheduled time to come and start again on the following Sunday, hoping to give more than I received. I don’t believe I was ever successful. Years have passed and I remain in contact with one of the women, many of them have gone home to glory.
Heroes don’t set out to become heroes, but they do intend to use their lives to affect change. So, how can you discover your closeted hero? Begin by asking yourself how you can be of service and what you have to offer. In your prayer work, ask God to use your life, your gifts and talents for the goodness of others. The people who I call “hero” probably had no idea they were making such a profound difference in my life. I bet they were just doing as they were led from within. They were just being themselves, and who they were helped me change my life. After praying and asking, it is important that you listen. Listen to your heart’s desires, listen to your Divine guidance and obey.
Begin taking actions towards the fulfillment of the direction and guidance given by the Spirit. Maybe you’ve always wanted to be a parent and it hasn’t happened yet. Your heart keeps telling you that parenting is a part of your life, but the man hasn’t shown up. Consider other avenues like providing foster care or adopting a child. The difference you make in a child’s life may far away exceed the picture you held tightly to in your mind. Or maybe you have a heart for teens, you just love talking and listening and inspiring them to be who they came here to be. Or maybe there is a friend in need, someone who can use your unconditional love and support? When you spot a need, just show up and give yourself.
I believe the longing that we experience to be successful, to fulfill our dreams and to achieve greatness is a direct call from God to use our lives for all of humanity. We may believe wealth and things will make us happy, and they may for a time. But using our lives for the goodness of all nurtures our souls and leads us directly to God’s heart.
When we were children maybe we wanted to be Wonder Woman. We dreamed of doing heroic deeds to save or serve others. We tied towels around our neck, extended our arms and ran as fast as we could. We believed we could be the difference in some hapless person’s life. Our childhood “pretend” games prepared us for our adult reality, which is that there are those who are stranded or stuck, not in burning buildings necessarily, but in poverty, broken heartedness, or unworthiness. They are waiting for you to put on your cape fly and offer them a new direction, a different perspective or a simple hand. What if we have come here to save one another? In one season we are hero, the tides change, and in the next season we need to be rescued ourselves. It’s not made for the imagination of children, there are no lights or adoring crowds, but it is a life built on compassion, connection and unconditional love.
A few weeks ago and long-time friend of mine, died of a heart attack, he was 36- years-old. Having known him very well, my first thought was that he used all of his life. He didn’t take any of it with him. He used it up as a teacher, a great friend and companion, a husband, a father, a brother, a mentor, an entrepreneur and so much more. At his funeral they called him hero. What will people say about you?
Peace and Blessings,
Monique Ruffin-James
The Honest to Goodness Truth:
John 3: 21 - But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.
Have you had times where you operated from a place of heroism? What was that like? What motivated your bravery, selflessness or faith? Please share your story with us. We want to applaud you!
Words to ponder on heroism . . .
Unhappy is the land that needs heroes.
Bertolt Brecht
The hero is one who kindles a great light in the world, who sets up blazing torches in the dark streets of life for men to see by.
Felix Adler
A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Aspire rather to be a hero than merely appear one.
Baltasar Gracian
A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself.
Joseph Campbell
A hero is a man who is afraid to run away.
English Proverb
A hero has faced it all: he need not be undefeated, but he must be undaunted.
Andrew Bernstein
The ordinary man is involved in action, the hero acts. An immense difference.
Henry Miller
To be a hero or a heroine, one must give an order to oneself.
Simone Weil
Nothing is given to man on earth - struggle is built into the nature of life, and conflict is possible - the hero is the man who lets no obstacle prevent him from pursuing the values he has chosen.
Andrew Bernstein
That’s what it takes to be a hero, a little gem of innocence inside you that makes you want to believe that there still exists a right and wrong, that decency will somehow triumph in the end.
Lise Hand
Heroes take journeys, confront dragons, and discover the treasure of their true selves.
Carol Lynn Pearson
If everybody was satisfied with himself there would be no heroes.
Mark Twain
Nurture your mind with great thoughts; to believe in the heroic makes heroes.
Benjamin Disraeli
Last summer I, Nicole, had the honor of meeting Sharon Vigil, our featured interviewee this issue. Along with the other members of His Beloved, I stayed at Harvest House during the Gospel Music Association’s “Music in the Rockies” event. (For more on that click here.) While we were up there, in Estes Park, with the intention to go to song writing seminars and compete against other bands, God had something else in mind. Under the roof of Harvest House I was confronted, head on, with the weight of the grace of God, the power of the love of God and the sovereignty of the purpose of God.
It was, even having gone of mission trips to Peru and S. Africa, the greatest confrontation of the battle that wages against my will and that of the will of God I have ever know. There we were, up in Estes Park, to “win” a band competition, and there was Sharon and the rest of the staff of Harvest House, toiling in obscurity in service to women of all backgrounds and with all manner of odds against them. I felt, for the first time in my life - in all honesty, that I was on holy ground within the premises of Harvest House. By the end of our time there, I found myself calling Sharon “mom” as if she had rescued me too from the darkness that is capable of snatching any one of us. And, truthfully, in a way she had. I was, if I’m being transparent, consumed with the idea of “the record deal” that the GMAs glorified . . . but after meeting Sharon and her adopted daughters, all of that seemed trivial and trite against the eternal work that she did. I remain grateful for her check, her selflessness and her humility. She’s one of my heroes.
Ladies . . . meet Sharon, or mom as she is affectionately known by many, many of our sisters.
Why did you start Harvest House?
When I accepted Jesus as my savior I fell in love with everybody. I had been a very lonely person and Jesus became so real to me that I just couldn’t keep it quiet. I would go out witnessing about His saving power and share with anyone that would listen to me. Also, one night after Sunday night church we took out our four children for a drink and I saw a young girl walking across the lot next to the restaurant and started talking to her about Jesus. We were talking when a man walked out of a bar across the street and crossed the street by us. Another man came out of the same bar and raised a gun and shot the man near us. Then the man that shot the gun ran up to the man laying on the ground and fired two more shots in his head. The young girl and I were witnesses to a murder. We ended up at the police station until early morning and all the time I shared with her that nothing happens by chance. I told her the Lord wanted to change her life, and she went home with me that night.
How did your family react initially and how do they currently participate?
My children were small 9, 8, 7 and 1½. My husband did not understand why I felt so compelled to witness to others. He let me do what I felt the Lord was directing me to do. After a while, he joined me full force. He would witness to the men and I would witness to the women. Our children grew up caring about others and sharing all they had with others that the Lord would bring to our home. They didn’t always like it, but we had to obey what the Lord called us to do. My children would give up their beds in the middle of the night to a stranger that came to our home.
At young ages our children reached out to others and were concerned with the well being of others. My husband and son gave up their privacy for these women to enter our home. Now my children are adults and they are all involved in the lives of others. My daughter, Karen went to college and got her degree in social work and joined Harvest House fulltime. My son came on staff 14 years ago fulltime to help us with the property that we now live on. My daughter Linda does our finances and handles all the dining room and kitchen menus and food buying. My daughter Christina is a hair stylist in Denver and she keeps all the women and children looking great. She also does intake for us. My husband and I are grateful to the Lord for all he has trusted us to do. We love the ministry that Jesus has trusted us with.
The women you serve have experienced great pain and darkness, how do you usher them back to the light, back to the living?
We know it is not us. Without the Holy Spirit doing the work it would not be done. Man cannot change man, all we can do is love them and show them a new life that can be theirs. The Holy Spirit is so awesome. We have the opportunity to love them and let them feel like they belong and are wanted. We have discovered a great principle and it is that love is what everyone is looking for, and when we know we are loved and truly cared for all things change.
I imagine this work can be very exhausting, how do you replenish your heart and soul and body?
We, as staff, back each other up. We stand in the Lord believing we are in the Lord’s will by having Harvest House and it is awesome to be involved in others’ lives. There is heartbreak when the women sometimes decide to leave before they are ready and take their children back to unhealthy places, but our hope is built on nothing less then Jesus and His righteousness.
What inspires you to do this work?
Seeing lives changed. Watching women and children with no hope get hope because of the hope of change and a true relationship with Jesus.
I would call you courageous having seen closely what addiction in women can do, are you ever afraid?
NO. I know Jesus has been so faithful to protect us in every situation. He has never let one hair on our heads be abused. He lets us know what to do and gives us a check if something is wrong. I really praise Him for this.
How do you assist these women in forgiving themselves and releasing the guilt?
Loving on them and telling them they are not a mistake. They have a purpose in life and letting them know its not to late to began anew. Also letting them repair or try to repair relationships with family.
Would you please share the personal rewards?
Seeing the women become someone they can be proud of. No longer walking in shame. Watching them become something they never dreamed they could be. Going forth with a new life ahead of them. Seeing them become good moms. Sitting down together and enjoying fellowshipping with them.
Do you believe your work is sacred, how so?
Yes I believe this is one of the highest callings, to love others more than yourself. Only God can make this happen. He calls us to love Him first, then others.
Are you living your God-given purpose? If yes, how so?
Yes, I believe so. I love others and am grateful that He allows me the privilege to have a part in their lives.
Do you see yourself as a hero? If yes, why? If not, how come?
No. I see Jesus as a hero. I am only a simple woman who He has allowed to serve Him. I do not want to be anyone’s hero. I want them, when they think of me, to want to do what I do: To love others day after day.
Who has been a hero in your life?
My husband is quite a hero. He has allowed me to follow my dreams and become a woman that desires to please the Lord. I am very grateful to him.
For more on Sharon and the incredible ministry of Harvest House, visit www.harvesthouseforwomen.org.
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