Time and other transitions . . .

Posted on March 18, 2007
Filed Under Uncategorized, Spirituality, Life |

On Saturday I was reminded that time passes and things change . . . for better or worse. This happens universally. My husband and I went up to Boulder yesterday to watch CU’s scrimmage/practice. (But of course we are still diehard Buff fans . . . like a 2-10 season could ever change that! Get real!) While we stood on the sidelines watching next season’s winning team do their thing, some of my husband’s old teammates had also made their way to the stadium. We enjoyed some laughs over times gone by with only a little embarrassment in the remembering. It seems like yesterday that Marc and I, with Ry in tow, left California for Colorado and only God knew what. I remember so vividly walking up the hill nearly every Saturday from our apartment to the stadium, huffing and puffing with a very fat Ryan on my hip, to watch the games. Nowadays we hop on the tollroad, pay $20 for parking, and STILL walk the hill to the stadium to watch Ry’s games. Funny.

I don’t know if I had any concept of time back then. I just knew that everything seemed so immediate and important and big and now. I believed that “today” was all I had . . . and while that was and is true . . . I treated that truth with recklessness at times, and ingratitude. Time, if you’re lucky, passes, and turns from days into years and years into decades. And, if you’re lucky, that truth doesn’t bum you out, but rather, it overwhelms you with awe and wonder and humility and thankfulness.

After the game, we came home and Marc and I sat on our porch while he had a cigar and I enjoyed a Guinness. We watched, almost nostalgic, as the kids on our block ran up and down it screaming, laughing, and occasionally crying. With our youngest son Cole having only two more years in high school, we are reminded, yet again, that time is a living, breathing, and untamable thing. One of our neighbors, with envy in her voice, commented that it must be nice to be able to sit outside and enjoy the sunshine without having to worry about where your four-year-old is and if he’s okay. She said this standing beside the new car we just bought Cole for his 16th birthday next month. The irony was not lost on me.

The Word so often chides us about the folly of dwelling in the past or living in the future. The Psalmist says This is the day the Lord has made. Jesus said “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” He even taught us, by his example, the importance of seeking God for our provisions daily . . . this day’s daily bread. And, when the children of Israel were mucking around in the desert, they got only enough manna for that day . . . they had to trust God for his provision in their tomorrows.

While the thought of that can scare me - it feels so well outside of my control or rather my need to control, I also find a comfort in it too. It’s an invitation to be present, to see and feel each moment as it unfolds. And, in this moment as I type this blog, I’m grateful for all the past moments that have led up to it. God is good. And, everyday in more ways than I’ll ever truly know, he generously meets our needs.

My grandmother used to say, “I just want to see it to the end.” I do too, but while I’m waiting for the proverbial “end” I don’t want to miss the moments in between. Because, my friend, life is happening. Now. Not yesterday anymore, and only maybe tomorrow.

Oh, and with all that said . . . GO BUFFS!

Peace and Blessings,

Nicole Walters